06 March 2014

Switzerland to Create New Canton?

Today I “Liked” the Facebook page for Canton Marittimo even though all the other posts are in Italian, which I don’ta speaka. I “liked” the page because I “love” their cause: to convince Switzerland to buy the beautiful Italian island of Sardinia.

The creators of this page have persuasive reasons for their proposal: The sale would put a dent in the Italian national debt, and enable Sardinians to convert to the world’s most coveted currency. And even though they don’t say this out loud, obviously, if Sardinia becomes part of CH, their air force could work shorter hours.

All molto buono for them, but what’s in it for Switzerland? First of all, at last we’d have our own Swiss beaches sprinkled with seashells and gorgeous olive-skinned formerly Italian babes and boys splashing in a real ocean full of calamari ready for the grill.

Also, we could suddenly brag that the heady, delicious Sardinian wines are “Swiss.”

But the best reason for CH to buy this idyllic Italian isle (where Mafia dons go mostly to molt, not to murder), is that we could thumb our nose at the European Union. They think that just because a miniscule majority of ill-informed Swiss voters recently decided in favor of quotas on immigrants, that we’ll no longer have access to the many thousands of cross-border workers who keep our economy well oiled every day. 

Possibly true, but guess what EU, with Canton Sardinia joining Svizzera, we’ll have a generous supply of eager, able, gorgeous workers – and calamari.

Seriously, it’s a complicated question we should consider carefully: Should Switzerland actually purchase Sardinia? Maybe Mykonos would be a better buy.

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